An open letter.

To whoever the asshat was who ran and tattled to the building assistant about my car being parked in the surface lot (where no time limits are posted) for a whole two hours:

Fuck you. No, really. Now I have to worry about my car getting booted overnight if I ever need mecha to come out to my work during the day, WHICH IS WHAT HAPPENED HERE, you asshole, IT WAS A VISITOR WHO PARKED THAT CAR THAT YOU COULDN'T STAND TO SEE TAKE UP A SPACE. You see, that is the only car we own, and mecha drives it way more than me. I think the last time I drove to work and actually parked was in early 2011. But I registered it on the company intranet like a good little employee, because, after all, there is a nonzero chance of me parking it all day.

But that is THE FAMILY CAR, and I'm not the only one who ever drives it. Sometimes mecha comes here to have lunch with me. Sometimes he's dropping something off, and once a week for a few months he comes to pick up our delivery of CSA vegetables. And he doesn't park in the employee garage because he doesn't have a keycard. He, a VISITOR, parks in the motherfucking VISITOR LOT.

Yes, even though the same car is registered on guru.

But now I've been warned that because I followed the rules and registered every car that I had the slightest chance of ever parking here at work, my car may be booted overnight if it dares sully the visitor lot again. You know, THE ONLY CAR WE HAVE. Stuck here overnight. Because you couldn't trip over yourself to run and tattle fast enough.

I was already having a miserable week, and you're picking a great time to make it worse.

So fuck you. May your own car refuse to start the next time you have a really important 8AM meeting. Me, I guess I just have to BUY AN EXTRA CAR just so my visitors can be permitted into the visitor lot. After all, there has never been any indication that it's not okay for one's friends or family to sit in that lot all day long... just as long as they have their own fucking car to do it in. But two hours with the wrong car and it's ZOMG NEXT TIME WE TELL YOUR BOSS WHAT YOU DID.

MotherFUCK.

Whatever the polar opposite of love is,
Jenny.

[Addendum] A few days after this happened, they put up signs with an actual stated time limit for use of the lot -- 30 minutes or less. I guess someone told them that it's kind of a dick move to punish improper use of something if you won't actually reveal what the proper use is! Especially when someone (like, say, me) emails you asking "hey what is an appropriate length of time to use the lot" and you ignore the question, THANKS BUILDING ASSISTANT LADY.[/Addendum]